Hope Is Not A Strategy

Come again?

What did she say?

How dare she!

I am probably going to upset a few people with today’s post but truth be told, I don’t like the word “hope”.

I actually avoid the word in my home at all costs.

Back in corporate America life once upon a time ago, I had a GM that said something to me that stuck so hard, it’s a part of my daily mantra of survival skills: “Hope is not a strategy.”

And you know what…it’s absolutely true.

If you want to win the lottery, you cannot just hope for the win. You have to go out, pick your numbers, purchase the ticket, and watch to see if you struck gold.

When I was ready for a career change, I did not hope for something different. I had to quit my cushioned bi-weekly paycheck and gather all the knowledge in me to go out and start my own company as an author.

Same goes for IVF.

When the doctor told Dan and I that we had less than 1% chance of conceiving on our own naturally, we did not “hope for a miracle.” We talked, we prayed, and we made the financial decision to go with IVF as the one and only chance we would have for me to carry a baby.

And I never “hoped” for the best.

I had faith that if we took all the necessary steps and precautions we were allowing ourselves the best chance possible to carry a baby.

And still, we had a miscarriage.

But, hope was still not a factor for me.

I believed in God and the power of medicine, and probably the most influential was Dan keeping me positive the entire time Ferris was being transferred. He gave me the strength to give this last embryo everything I had with the power of faith, love, and science that this time, the baby was going to take to my body. I would not fail.

And it worked.

I’ve said it before that IVF is a gamble.

But so is life.

And in my world, I play with everything on the table.

So if you are going through IVF, I want nothing more than a positive outcome for you. I want you to follow doctor’s orders and carry a healthy baby full-term with a safe and beautiful delivery.

But, I want to stress you will need to give of your mind, body, and soul to a positive pregnancy. Not just hope for the best.

You can do this.

You want(ed) this baby so bad it hurts.

You know it’s not going to be easy.

You know you are stronger than others will ever understand.

We are in this together.